Divorce is the most severe situation that a child experiences in the expansion and development life that they have to cope up with. The consequences divorce has on children depend on age of the kid when divorce occurs. Other factors that establishes the effects the divorce impacts on children depends on child's personality and the gender, the support offered by other family members and relatives aside from the frequency of issues and disagreements between parents determines the magnitude of the result. In consideration of age, small children who are below two years old are less afflicted by divorce although this may not be the situation when there's a close relationship between the children and the parent or guardian (s). These newborns do not get to understand the type of the turmoil but still they respond to the changes that accompany divorce. When such a situation is susceptible to happen, the worried parents should make special and prior preparations on childcare and parenting to lessen the negative affect their parting would impact on children (Alison and Cornelia 34).
Children who are yet to join college (preschool children) usually takes the blame incase divorce and parting occurs. That is facilitated by their fear of been left behind and left only by parents' parting. However if separation through divorce take place, preschoolers responds by embracing be uncooperative, angry and frustrated. Their personality is also greatly afflicted and they change completely of their first socialization when they become intense and disobedient towards any adult near them while living a life of denial that nothing took place (DeBord 12).
Divorce has the greatest and resilient effect on school aged children than the kids. Their personality and emotional attachment with their parent is so strong that they find it extremely difficult to deal up and change with the new situation of loneliness of either mother or father. The difficult situation experienced by elementary children who are college age group results from their maturity to understand just of situation that is going on with their parents. This age group is adult and old enough to comprehend and have the pain associated with separation from divorce of the parents. The unfortunate part that college age children experience is the inability they need to control the inner pain caused by divorce (Mary 1).
The manifestations associated with effects of divorce upon this age group of children are resentment, grief, intense anger, embarrassment, resentment and divided devotion. They also tend to be isolated from other children and could develop total withdraw from other children's activities like creative learning and games. These children live with a desire that their parents will still gain together; in case of normally, these children feel rejected by the father or mother who left. Aside from personality and mental effects, divorce as of this age may affect the fitness of children who may frequently complain of stomachaches and head aches (Eileen and Josephine 23).
When divorce occurs during adolescent stage of children, its results are more severe than another stage in child's development. Some young adults feel discontinued, guilt and a feeling fear. Their psychological create is seriously disrupted by divorce; they experience loneliness, despair and anger towards other folks and usually their parents especially the one who has left. During this era, the children are mature enough to take care of some family tasks. Nonetheless they feel punished and burdened in particular when they are accountable for the childcare of these youthful siblings. Their response is usually swift and they try to fill up the difference by presuming adult responsibilities scheduled to high degrees of stress and low energy levels using their parents. Some teens struggle with intimate desires given that they have no one to confine to and experience low self-confidence of handling relationship and engaged and getting married. Since teenagers comprehended well the complexities and situations encompassing their parents separation and subsequent divorce, their steadiness in education greatly declines credited to lack of concentration and stableness, in addition, they are not able to offer with future changes happening in their family life. Children in this age bracket gets themselves in a perplexed state of mind since they are unable to make a decision which parent to accept over the other (Hughes 12).
The pressure they experience on deciding who to blame for the reason for divorce stress them up impacting negatively their academic life declining in performance given that they spend a lot of their college time analyzing and thinking about the situation again at home. Also, they are occupied with many thoughts particularly if they have assumed responsibilities to manage their younger siblings. Their mental status is greatly damaged since they experienced whatever occurred using their parents; they lose self-confidence with marriage organizations and do no more have capacity and confidence to handle their family life (Mary 1).
Based on gender, children who are elevated by parent or guardian of the contrary love-making are greatly affected by divorce more than children elevated by fathers and girls brought up by moms after divorce. Children raised by opposite sex have a tendency to develop aggressive behaviours and resentment. Mental disorders are common to children brought up by opposite love-making parent while those elevated by same love-making tends to be responsible and respond to their environments more quickly. Although age, gender and other factors have been identified as influencers of the amount to how children respond or/ and afflicted by divorce, the most determining factor is the parent or guardian to children romantic relationship (Alison and Cornelia 43).
However, children should be aided to modify to divorce situations in their life. The parent or guardian in custody of children should consistently maintain communication and dialogue of divorce it doesn't matter how agonizing it is to the children to help them get over it. This process will also assure their assurance and adequately make them for the future especially the adolescent group who requires understanding in a far more specific manner than more youthful ones. To recuperate quickly and reduce the effects of divorce, conflicts and aggressiveness of parents after divorce should be minimized and avoided when possible. Finally disruptions of children should be maintained at low levels always and parents must have proper strategies of how to approach after divorce occasions.
- Alison Clarke and Cornelia Brentano, "Divorce: causes and outcomes, " Yale: Yale University Press, 2006
- DeBord Kennedy, "Focus on Kids: The consequences of divorce on children, " NEW YORK, Cangage Learning, 1997
- Eileen Hetherington and Josephine Arasteh, " Impact of divorce, solo parenting and step parenting on children, NY: Routledge, 2001
- Hughes Recker, "Parenting by yourself:" Illinois, Routledge, 1999
- Mary Temke, "The consequences of Divorce on Children: Family and Consumer Resources, " Retrieved on April 5th 2010 from: http://74. 125. 153. 132/search?q=cache%3AQPgXCQMt0pcJ%3Aextension. unh. edu%2FFamily%2FDocuments%2FDivorce. pdf+The+negative+effects+of+divorce+on+children&hl=en&gl=ke