Keywords: children and religion
Many have heard of "yuppies" but perhaps you have heard of "dinkies"? The first type refers to those young urban professionals who are fiscally secured. Dinkies (two times income but no kids) make reference to those married couples having no intent or unwilling to acquire children.
Look at mother nature - birds, bees, trees, crops and all the living things created by God. Will there be a specie that does not reproduce? Every God's creature, a good single-celled amoeba, procreates for the survival of these specie. Yet why some married couples, with the capacity of being parents, refused to have children?
"Freedom to visit and to take it easy" is a regular answer. Other reasons include less expenditures, less responsibilities and fewer problems - in a nutshell less headaches. One or two crudely replied, " We simply don't like children" as if they have never been children themselves. Some argue that the old Chinese aphorism, "raising children to guard our old age, " no longer is applicable as they noticed the presence of neglected parents around.
They are absolutely right. Bringing up children involves countless sacrifices and quitting many of life's entertainment. A parent's obligations begin from a child's conception onwards to adulthood and oftentimes beyond. From a solely economic viewpoint, making an investment the money put in in bringing up and educating a child could easily give a comfortable retirement.
All these reasons centre on staying away from responsibility and increasing entertainment in life. Barring any justifiable reason, there is only one appropriate term to spell it out this self-centred frame of mind - selfishness.
The reason to improve and sacrifice for our children can be summarized simply in one word - love - the opposite of selfishness.
Love for God, our Inventor by pursuing Christ's teachings. "Maried people should respect it as their proper quest to transmit human life also to educate their children; they ought to realize that these are in that way cooperating with the love of God the Inventor. They will match this duty with a sense of human being and Religious responsibility. " (CCC #2367)
Love for our spouse, i. e. to bring forth the fruits of the sacred relationship. "Fecundity (producing or with the capacity of producing offspring) is something special, a finish of marriage, for conjugal love by natural means is commonly productive. " Children are the fruits of your love for our spouse and fulfillment of your marriage. The Catechism instructs "A kid does not result from outside the house as something added on to the common love of the spouses, but springs from the heart of this mutual supplying, as its berry and fulfillment. " (CCC #2379)
Look at those who intentionally shrink from other responsibility of experiencing children. They could look happy and carefree but can they really find delight in their lives? I sensed sorry for a previous colleague experiencing mid-life emotional problems. Adamantly, he ridiculed the formality of marriage and refused to have children. I think about if his hottest Mercedes limousine, latest audio-visual equipment, memory of world travel and investment profile could take the place of children - God's gift that he had refused - in supplying delight to him and his partner.
Danny, a friend who recovered totally from cancer, told me that the support of his wife and two daughters provided him the courage to withstand the rigors of chemotherapy and other pains. He praised God for the most important present, his children.
As for those neglected parents in their old age, they did their responsibilities for God and because of their children. Whether their children will gratify their own towards their parents is another subject. In comforting neglected parents, my wife, Mary, explained, "Consider the enjoyment and joy that your son or daughter had given to you as consolation for your past sacrifices and love. Be glad that you have done your work. "
"A child is not something owed to one, but is something special. The 'supreme gift idea of matrimony' is a real human person. " However, those lovers who didn't receive this surprise do not need to despair. "(They) should unite themselves with the Lord's Mix, the source of most spiritual fecundity. They can give expression to their generosity by implementing forgotten children or carrying out demanding services for others. " (CCC#2379)
Before getting the surprise of children at his old age, Abraham asked God, "What will you give me for I continue childless?"(Gen 15:2) Bear in mind, sometimes God acts in a secret way. Spouses experiencing infertility might not exactly recognize that God's gift comes in many ways and at different time. Instead of giving them children, He might have given other gift ideas. Have trust and follow His will.
For those who find themselves struggling to aid large people, they can find solace in our Church's coaching: "Sacred Scripture and the Church's traditional practice see in large households an indicator of God's blessing and the parents' generosity (CCC#2373). Our kids are indeed a blessing and a present from God.
